Obviously, things with Max's health are moving along just swimmingly. The difficult part now is that we are all just tired. As I referenced in my post last week, we are all increasingly tired of this lifestyle. We would like the happy times back. We are all doing our best to remain upbeat and positive, knowing this is all temporary but, it is taking its toll on all of us and wearing us down somewhat. As I have said to many people, my life, in particular, was quite difficult before I had a child with a life threatening illness. Having three kids in six years was keeping me busy...now add in the worries and work associated with Max's illness and I am just wiped out. Matt feels the same way. His job has gotten increasingly challenging over the past few years, as has our life at home with the three busy youngsters. Now he is feeling the pressure of the bad economy at work (not to mention that I am not working right now either) and is coming home to three energetic kiddos that have been stuck at home for months! It's a lot to handle for both of us. Then we added Spud into the mix and while he has brought lots of joy to all of us, he is also no picnic! As everyone knows, puppies are work...lots of it! He is great at causing lots of trouble, especially each morning. His favorite thing to do is to steal a paci from Ellee and then run out the dog door so that I have to chase him around on the deck and in the yard to retrieve it. Fun!
THE CHOSEN MOTHERS
By Erma Bombeck
Most women become mothers by accident, some by choice, a few by social pressures, and a couple by habit. Did you ever wonder how mothers of children with life threatening illnesses are chosen? Somehow I visualize God hovering over Earth selecting His instruments for propagation with great care and deliberation. As He observes, He instructs His angels to make notes in a giant ledger.
“Armstrong, Beth, son, patron saint Matthew. Forrest, Marjorie, daughter, patron saint Cecilia. Rutledge, Carrie, twins, patron saint Gerard.” Finally, He passes a name to an angel and says... “Give her a child with a life threatening illness.”
The angel is curious. “Why this one God? She is so happy.”
“Exactly” smiles God. “Could I give a child with an illness to a mother who does not know laughter? That would be cruel”
“But does she have patience?” asks the angel.
“I don’t want her to have too much patience or she will drown in a sea of self-pity and despair. Once the shock and resentment wears off, she will handle it.”
“I watched her today. She has that feeling of self and independence that is so rare and so necessary in a mother. You see, the child I’m going to give her has its’ own world. She has to make it live in her world and that’s not going to be easy.”
“But Lord, I don’t think she believes in you”.
“No matter. I can fix that. This one is perfect. She has just enough selfishness.”
The angel gasps – “Selfishness? Is that a virtue?”
God nods. “If she can’t separate herself from the child occasionally, she’ll never survive. Yes, here is a woman whom I will bless with a child less than perfect. She doesn’t realize it yet, but she is to be envied. She will never take anything her child does for granted. She will never consider a single step ordinary. I will permit her to see clearly the things I see: ignorance, cruelty, prejudice....and allow her to rise above them. She will never be alone. I will be at her side every minute of every day of her life, because she is doing My work as surely as if she is here by My side”.
“And what about her patron Saint?” asks the Angel. His pen poised in mid-air.
God smiles. “A mirror will suffice”.